Monday, January 11, 2010

Fictional Correspondence between a Bailed out Banker and an American Taxpayer

The American Taxpayer: “Dear sir, I would like to apply for a loan of $10,000 from your bank to tide me over. Can you help?”

The Bailed out Banker: “Dear taxpayer, what is your financial situation at this time? Do you have a job? Own a house, or a car, or any other securities?”

The American Taxpayer: “I lost my job when my firm went bankrupt after buying lousy securities from your bank. I lost my house after I lost my job. My house has since been repossessed by your bank. I also lost my car which was also repossessed by your bank. I am now on welfare.”

The Bailed out Banker: “I am very sorry to hear about your misfortune, but, in our business we only lend to good credit risks.”

The American Taxpayer: “Pardon me if I sound upset, but your bank was bailed out by billions of taxpayers dollars, some of them were mine and now you have the cheek to preach to me about ‘good credit risks.’ Do you know the meaning of hypocrisy?”

The Bailed out Banker: “Please do not get sarcastic with me. We are a reputable banking firm, who do not, I repeat, do not, lend money to welfare cases. We believe in free enterprise, getting government out of the marketplace, and honesty in the financial system. I suggest you start looking for a job and repay your welfare money.”

The American Taxpayer: “I have had it with you guys. You are the biggest welfare bums in society today. You were bailed out with taxpayer dollars which in my mind constitutes corporate welfare. You even gave yourselves bonuses courtesy of the taxpayer, after being bailed out. Now you have the gall to tell me to get a job. It is taxpayer money, some of it mine, that is keeping you in a job!”

The Bailed out Banker: “Please do not write me anymore. I am ending this correspondence after this reply to you. This bank did not get a bailout it got a stimulus package to enable it to keep the financial system stable. We will continue to operate on free market principles and let the marketplace decide. There will always be winners and losers in the free market financial system, and I remind you once again, we don’t lend to, or bail out losers.”

Stephen J. Gray
January 11, 2010.