Thursday, March 22, 2012

Big Tony, Former Gangster Talks with the Godfather

Big Tony, Former Gangster Talks with the Godfather
(Satire) By Stephen J. Gray

Big Tony: “Boss I would like to thank you for taking the Mob Family legitimate, and joining the Wall St. elites. I feel we are now productive members of society and gainfully employed. I also realise honesty is the best policy.”

The Godfather: “Thank you Tony. There comes a time when we must assimilate into society and put our past behind us.”

Big Tony: “Right on boss, I feel right at home doing business in the financial industry and selling securities and mortgages. Our company has done well and we have many friends on Wall St.”

The Godfather: “Yes, Wall St. is a fine place to do business and we have met many respectable people.”

Big Tony: “Very true boss. Though I must admit some of their ethics puzzle me.”

The Godfather: “Why is that Tony?”

Big Tony: “Well Boss, I remember when we were running our thing, selling phony securities and committing fraudulent acts, some of the Family got jail time. Now fraudulent acts, and thieving and robbing have become legitimate, and those who commit fraud get bailed out with tax-payers dollars. And some have been known to advise the government.”

The Godfather: Tony, I wish you would stop using words like fraud, thieving and robbery. These are honest people you are talking about and everything they do is sanctioned by the government.

Big Tony: “Gee boss, I guess maybe, I am confused. But, I still believe, if we had lost money to these sharks somebody would be getting whacked.”

The Godfather: “Tony, please stop calling respectable businessmen and financiers sharks. These people help run the system. And for goodness sake stop using words like whacked. We don’t do that kind of stuff anymore.”

Big Tony: “Okay boss. I’m sorry. But hey, maybe we could have the fraudsters and thieves droned.”

The Godfather: “What do you know about drones?”

Big Tony: “I read somewhere that the government has these weapons called drones and that a person operates them from miles away resulting in a nice clean hit. We sure could have used them in the old days for killing.”

The Godfather: “Tony. You must stop talking about hits and killing. We are respectable now and work within the law. The government uses drones to maintain law and order in the world.”

Big Tony: “Whatever you say boss, but these drones scare me. They can blow people away in an instant and nobody knows who done it. They have even killed children and other people by mistake. At least when we were in the killing business we had the guts to appear at the scene of the hit. Now they send drones. Where is the ethics?”

The Godfather: “Tony, ethics are when you have the power, and the government gets its power from the people who vote them into power. Just like the Family voted me into power. Therefore, when you have the power anything goes. Does that answer your question?”

Big Tony: “No offence boss, but I am still puzzled about this power thing. Does this mean that the government has the power to kill people it does not like? We used to do that before we became respectable. Are we ruled by government gangsters?”

The Godfather: “Tony, Tony, Tony, stop using that word gangster, these are decent people you are word abusing. Can’t you get it through your thick head that the government is a law unto itself? It can do anything it likes and does so, that’s why we live in a free country and that’s why we became legitimate businessmen and moved to Wall St.”

Big Tony: “Boss, I have no problem with Wall St. In fact, I wonder why it took us so long to get here. First they sell homes and mortgages to people and sell the debt back and forth. Then they foreclose on the people when they go broke. But, the Bankers get bailed out by tax-payers dollars including the taxes paid by people who lost their homes and jobs. Then they buy up the foreclosed homes at bargain prices and then prepare to sell the homes all over again. I sometimes wonder why the ordinary person cannot get bailed out. I guess that would be socialism. But I’m not complaining, this free enterprise system is wonderful, and we let the marketplace decide things and if the market needs money it gets bailed out too. Sometimes I think these honest financiers have copied our ideas on scamming the stiffs. Anyway, these are just my opinions. Wall St. is just a big Family like us and now we are all one Big Family together. Let’s go celebrate.”

Stephen J. Gray
March 22, 2012.

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